Sunday, 15 February 2009

Rage Against the Mewchine

Ventilation of spleen.

I'm generally happy to let live when it comes to cats. Sam likes to coo at them, and I have little beef with them - except when I amble out into the back yard following the wet weather and count no less than twenty-nine little heaps in a space little bigger than a small garage.

Within seconds, I've exceeded my yearly quota of expletives and I'm suddenly overcome by loathing for the little... fuckers! A couple of months ago, the council put a card through our door about 'dog fouling' - did we know whose canine was responsible etc.

I'm not sure there's much they can do about our feline friends.

When you present this image of cats to cat owners, they tend to shrug their shoulders and smile in a smug sort of fashion. "You should just get a cat," they say, in a tone of voice that would accommodate "a job," "some qualifications", or "a life" with equal condescension.

It's a curious twist on a world of haves and have-nots - like a cuter, paw-printed version backyard Thatcherism. Grrr.


Shane said...

Pepper (allegedly), curry plants (I made that one up), a really good water pistol (used that one on neighbours' cats), or a catapult.

I'll say no more.

klahanie said...


Awhile back I did a blog which mentions my own frustration with our feline 'friends'.

"Now then, speaking of the old dog versus cat debate. Guide dog, police dog, sheepdog ( no, it turns out, that it aint part sheep, part dog), watchdog (no that isn't some terrier wearing a timepiece) and ofcourse we have the sniffer dog (don't ask). Guide cat? Well no. Police cat? I don't think so. Sheepcat? Cats hurding sheep? You're having a laugh. Watchcat? More like: 'watch cat' rip up your rubbish and shit in your vegetable patch. Sniffer cat? Oh yeah they sniff alright. Sniffing around for food. 'Hey you useless human, where the hell is my meal?' Meow..."
Thanks for this blog...oh and one more thing about cats...If your house catches on fire and your fire alarm isn't working, the dog will warn you; whilst kitty f**ks off out the catflap....

Meanwhile... said...

Ha ha aha aha ha... possible contender for comment of the year there, Klahanie. Thanks for stopping by.

klahanie said...

My pleasure to drop by. Thanks again for your 'mewsings'.
I notice you are linked in with my good friend, the legend that is Blueshawk.
Take good care and happy blogging.
klahanie aka Gary.